Celebration of the suffering woman

I am part of yet another whatsapp group that adds 1% value and 99% noise to my life. we all have that, dont we?

I have been recently exiting from the ones that give me almost 100% noise - have to say, my life is marginally better.

Smirk all you want, marginally better is still better.

This particular group is that of the women in the nearby apartments. They share a lot of forward messages, and once in a while get together to celebrate stuff, which is good. Life should have some celebrations.

the most recent call for celebration has been for karva chauth, a north indian festival in which the women (ONLY women, not men) fast the whole fucking day, without even drinking a drop of water until the moon comes up in the sky. Reason for fasting - so that the husband can enjoy good health.

Ironic, i would have thought its a better idea to starve the husband so that his digestive system gets some rest and thus improve his health.

but then, what do i know? I am from the south, thats not even India right? thats just where all the anti-nationals live. Anyway, thats another day's discussion.

So a load of 'happy karva chauth' and wishes for this 'blessed' and 'precious' and 'joyous' day lands on my phone. The ladies would be dressing up, make up jewellery et all, and gather to celebrate and wait for the moon.

Fun fact. its a cloudy night in Singapore. it rained almost all day. and they arent supposed to break the fast till they see the fuckin moon.

Ever since I am part of this whatsapp group, i have been enlightened. The calls for 'vrath' (fast from food & drinks) for women and the glorification of the clueless male in the house happens every few months.

There is raksha bandhan - here the sister bows down to touch the feet of the brother no matter how young the boy is and the boy is supposed to vow to protect the girl.

Bhai dhooj - something similar to raksha bandhan.

I hear 'teej' every now and then, this happens more than once a year - again the women fast. its supposed to signify the victory of a wife's love and devotion to the husband. this is just the tip of the iceberg, there are many more.

All in all, you get the drift, it is entirely one sided. the women celebrates the man.

There is not a single vrat that the man observes to win the wife's love or praying for the woman's health. Clearly signifying that it doesnt matter.

Throughout the rituals and festivals, the same singular message gets reinforced. 'a man is important, a woman is insignificant'.

and then when the female baby gets killed at birth or there is female foeticide, we just cannot understand why!

The men and the boys eat first, served by the women and then whatever remains is eaten by the women - served by themselves. the boy gets education and the girl is married off early by giving loads of gold and cash to the man.

The high number of rapes can be no surprise to a culture that treats the woman as the submissive servant.

Out of all this, what angers me most is calling the suffering as celebration. Right now, there are couple of dozens of starving women down there in the common area 'celebrating' and feeling great about their sacrifice.

Congratulations, your husband is not any fitter than he was yesterday, you on the other hand after the 50 times you fasted last year, could have caused yourself irreversible damage.

but that doesnt matter to you, does it? You have been taught and now you fully believe that you dont matter.. if you needed to matter, even to yourself, you should have a penis.

Vaanga engineering pannalaam

There was a story that our language teacher in school used to relate, quite often. too often.
You can imagine..with the kind of memory power that I have, it has still hung on to my brain.

back in the times of yore, there was this learned guy, who used to speak a lot of languages. he was so skilled in all of them that no one really knew which language was his mother tongue. This guy used to go to several kings' courts and challenge the ministers there to find his mother tongue. The kings' men used to bring scholars and linguistic experts and make them analyse the wise guy's language to find out if his speech had an accent or inclination to certain state, area or country. but none of that worked and wise guy kept getting popular and making money out of his challenges.

One shrewd minister thought of a not-so-nice way to find out the truth. while wise guy was asleep, well into night, the minister slipped in through his bedroom window with a huge hammer. The minister then tip toed close to wise guy and banged hard with the hammer on wise guy's right toe and immeditely slipped behind the curtains.

Wise guy woke up into a fit and started cursing black and blue and not finding what had stung him, went back to bed still muttering and cursing and whining from the pain.

Next day in court, the minister related the previous nights accounts and announced with conviction the mother tongue of the wise guy. Finally the challenge was won.

Ya so, as it goes, This language- our mother tongue, the thing that we think in.. also the one by which we show our extreme emotions- We get angry in that, we love in that, we crack jokes in that. but facts can always be taught and understood in any language. E=mc^2. Mariana trench is 35,797 ft deep. The first world war was between 1914-1918. I learnt them in english, which is definitely not my mother tongue, but i still know them facts and in fact learning them in english has helped me not to confine myself within the state of tamilnadu.

So what I really dont understand is, why has the tamilnadu government decided to introduce new engineering courses in Tamil?! and how does the government expect the kids graduating from these colleges to find jobs???

Why cant they just leave us to do our cursing and joking in tamil.. who are they trying to please by making us learn engineering in tamil, what purpose do they think that education will serve? Enna koduma sir ithu..

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/chennai/TN-to-experiment-with-engineering-courses-in-Tamil/articleshow/5614006.cms

Should I forget this?

I have not been able to get this image out of my head. I have been trying to forget this... but tell me, should I really forget it?

8 maoists had been killed in a police encounter on 16 June in West Bengal, Midnapore. Seen in the image - security personnel carrying the dead body of one rebel. a maoist. a woman. a human being. Did I give you enough key words? were you able to understand what the image is about?

Yes. you have to read the words to believe that its a human dead body that is being taken away by two other human beings.

I thought we are Indians. we treat animals better than that, dont we?

Though only 8 bodies were recovered, the officials suspect more were killed. The maoists are said to have carried away atleast 4 more bodies while fleeing. Yes, they are believed to have carried 4 dead human beings while they were fighting for their own lives.

Maoist rebels hardly ever leave behind their dead comrades, reports a website.

To me, they do not sound like the people who are capable of killing hundreds of civilians. A person carrying away a dead person risking his own life - in my dictionary, is 'sensitive'. What makes these people who have so much respect even for their dead to kill and slaughter other people?

Killing is bad. I have been taught. I am not capable of killing. But then, I have never been pushed off the brink of my existence. How can I even talk about understanding this sect of people. Would I ever turn to be capable of killing if I get oppressed the way this class of people are oppressed? Would you? Do I know the answer to this question? Do you?

Well.. if Shakira says so

Waka waka.. sings Shakira
This time for Africa!

Well, I am not very convinced, but if she says so... I guess its gonna be so..

Its the song, not the game I am talking about.

Friend showed me the official video of waka waka. I have to say, though I liked the song, I am definitely definitely disappointed with the video.

I would think this is THE event, millions and millions of viewership. For the song thats so attached to it, someone could have put in a little more money, get a better location for shooting Shakira than just a grey walled studio throughout the song...In the same front angle. What were the directors thinking? Why wouldnt they get a little more imaginative? At least, a whirl around of the camera please?

I knew something was really missing in the video, only after watching it repeatedly could I put a finger on it. Okay, so you get Shakira to move in front of the camera, alright. But... You have the audacity to make her completely cover her hips!?! That is almost criminal for Pete's sake!
What was her costume designer thinking. Was he/she thinking at all?

Call me picky, but I am not crazy about the way the frames have been mixed either. ( It starts well though)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRpeEdMmmQ0&feature=fvst

:) thats enough complaining for the next 2 months! Anyway, its out of the system and me feeling better ;)

The guilty generation

• Punishing yourself for no apparent reason.
• Living a loser's life by letting go what could be yours if you had focussed and worked towards it,
• Wanting to have no interest in people, work and the things around you...

In other words,

• Penance,
• Sacrifice,
• Denial of worldly pleasures..

Sometimes we are a confused lot. What should ideally be considered as a psychiatric condition that should be cured is considered as righteousness and spirituality. If a person loses interest in everything around him, inflicts pain on himself, runs away from happiness like its a plague, shouldnt we take him to a doctor and get his head examined? Much worse, what if he starts preaching these things to other people and calls it religion?

Should we acknowledge and agree that we should feel guilty for happiness or should we just tell him to shut up and get lost?

Giving it some time

I was trying to use an application on my computer system. Though this was everyday stuff at work, the computer today was not very co-operative. it just kept on hanging every few seconds. And this was just the beginning of the day! just 10 AM in the morning. I had a helluva lot of work to be done and the phone was ringing incessantly- calls from all the ppl to whom i owed the work.

I was getting very impatient and had ended the program couple of times with Cntrl+Alt+Del. Now, I couldnt do that any longer because I had typed a long and complicated mail and I did not want to end program lest the mail gets lost without saving.

I had had an incredibly long day the day before, infact the past many weeks had been unusually hectic. Yesterday, I had worked for 14 soild hours and that too in a feverish pace, spending just ten minutes on lunch. I didnt wanna do that again today! I had got up in the morning looking for my jeans, thinking today is the casual friday but realised its just tuesday! and to top it all, my computer wont behave and its just the start of another long day!

I was at the end of my wits. What I really wanted to do was turn the table and break the **** computer and tear the papers that were waiting to be reviewd and rip the phone lines which hadnt stopped ringing. But, instead I closed my eyes. My eyes were burning due to lack of sleep. Tonight, I thought(as I used to think everyday), I will have a long, long, peaceful sleep. For a few minutes, my mind went blank and I stopped thinking - it was easy, tired that I was, I could easily switch off.

I opened my eyes few minutes later, to see that nothing has changed. The system was still hung and not working, the phone was still ringing, the papers were still there and one of the project managers had left a CD on my table to install an application(more work for me) I wanted to scream, but I realised that I was less angry than I was before.

I got up and got out of the crazy zone, I just decided to give it some time. after all, all those people saying 'time heals' cannot be total empty heads! My system manager used to tell us to give the system some time while in hang ups. I really hoped the time theory worked on my over worked brain and my stupid over worked electronic box.

I hadnt read the papers, I started with metro plus and soon I was completely engrossed in the news. I didnt bother to answer any more calls. After about twenty full minutes, I folded the papers and got up, completely distracted and feeling better, I returned to my desk and saw that my PC had got back its senses and was out of its trance and that my mail was not lost.

I hit the send button and started on the day's work, afresh, anew. I knew I would feel doubly frustrated and just worser than ever by the end of the day, but that did not matter. This was 'the now' and I was feeling better. Giving it some time helps, a lot! so far proved by experience on human nervous system and a few select electonic machines!

Pain

When we are not prepared to handle a let-down in a relationship, the hurt travels too deep into the mind. Philosophers say that you should never expect anything from anyone. I really don’t see that as a good way of life. Come on, whats life without expectations? its VOID! It just does not work that way. Expectations are part of life.

Moreover, its not that you are going to have expectations from just about anyone you see on the street. It happens with people whom you believe are responsible, are trustworthy. When these so-called 'responsible' people let you down in a relationship, thats when it hurts, you feel pain. Sometimes you are shocked. It takes time for reality to sink in. After all the pain and fuss, what makes you get on to your normalty path is the fact that you are independent. What happens if you are so dependent on your 'trustworthy' relationship that you cannot function without their support? You either wither away, or you learn to be independent.

So, that said, Do expect, all the nice things that can ever happen :)
but whatever you are dealing with- people, machines..just remember that it’s a highly dysfunctional lot that you are handling. So be ready for mal-functions!

After all, surprises are part of everyday, aren’t they? As if I am gonna accept your argument! Ha ha

This is sounding good, on second thoughts, maybe i should put this under the label gyaan..

The chances we take in life and my mood today

Yes, This post has got nothing to do with any chances anybody takes on anything and is all about my mood today.
And yes, I am evil! I conspired and cooked this title up so you would stop by and read this, expecting it to be some mantra of life.. otherwise why would u want to know about my mood???

Hey come on, dont stop reading, atleast not yet!
I deserve atleast one soul listening to my sad notes :(

so, my mood- awry! awfully awry. its not often that this happens. and not that iam not trying to do anything about it, I am trying. but everytime i read something or listen to someone trying to cheer me up, i get wilderly sadder.

after trying for a long time, i am just resigning this as one of those off-days. We all have it on and off. So, tell me, do you have off-days too? What do you do about it? Does anything at all cheer you up? Drop in your comments

You are FREE..finally!!!!! yeah..but whats so exciting abt it?

There are times when you are just baffled by the fact that you are so independant!

You have done studying, have finished slogging through those hard mathematical problems and chemical equations and never-ending homework..you dont have to prepare for one exam after the other..School and College are actually over!

You have gone through and come out of those jobless days when you attended a minimum of two interviews a day and lived on unbelievably less money so you dont have to ask mom and dad for money. Now you have a reasonably paying job. No more waiting for pocket money to buy an icecream.
You are no more a 'teenager'/adamant adolescent-so, no more taking permission from mom to watch the movie you wanted to go to with friends.. No more curfews on weekend nights..

Now you are grown-up (!?!) You have total freedom. You are independant- physically, mentally, financially. but, wait a second, what are you going to do with all the freedom and the glorified rights that you have in life?? All those textbooks and seminars had never taught what is to be done when one fine day, you are free from the several bondages that had held you back so long!
Enough food for thought for a few seconds? why dont you tell me what you have done/are doing/will do with your freedom.. Leave your comments..